Do you ever look over at your child and think Oh My God I bloody love you!
I am sure the answer is yes. We all feel this every day. I had it today; Josh has been ill for a few days now and is finally starting to perk up and feel better and he’s been a little joy. It’s been like having my baby back!
Dealing with a poorly baby has NOT been fun. I’ve been vomited on, I’ve had to watch the poor little mite crying his eyes out and it’s been a guessing game to figure out what was wrong with him. You just want to take all the pain away don’t you!
On top of vomit, a lot of tears and the need to drink some gin on a TUESDAY (I know – but it was a shitter of a day), we’ve been experiencing some extreme cabin fever. Seriously there is litte worse than being stuck inside for days on end. Thank Goodness by the weekend Josh was better and as you will have seen on Instagram, we managed to have a couple of days away at the in-laws farm up in North Norfolk; we certainly made up for our lack of fresh air.
Dealing with a toddler and a sick bug got me thinking. When you become a mother there are certain things you suddenly can do and, hand in hand of course, there are things you can’t do anymore.
- So it appears that I have a MUCH stronger stomach than I used to. The mere thought of vomit used to make me heave! Even as a partying 21 year old, if one of the girls had a bit too much wine and I had to hold their hair back (TRUE FRIEND ME) I’d usually follow suit just at having to deal with them! However now, with a toddler that managed to projectile vomit across my lounge, thus ruining my pile rug (How will I EVER get the smell out) I somehow manage to take it all in my stride and deal with it!
- Function with very little sleep. This applies to all us Mummas! Recently I’ve been suffering with insomnia and waking up super early (I’m writing this at 5.15am cause I couldn’t sleep). Not an ideal situation when you have a little on that keeps you on the go ALL DAY LONG! Yet somehow we power through. Those early days of motherhood clearly mould us into super women who can function on 5 hours sleep (and even if that’s if we’re lucky) although this is usually with the help of coffee and cake!
- Be ready within 20 minutes. I can be up, showered, dressed and make up on in super quick time. I love my make up and I used to relish taking my time in trying new products. Now though, make up is done within about three minutes!!
- Deal with the tantrums! I’m quite tough and when he has a meltdown I do just let him get on with it because if it’s just a brat moment over something and nothing, I find ignoring him means he usually gets bored of said tantrum pretty quickly and comes to me for a cuddle instead…. usually when I’ve had to turn my back because I don’t want him to see me laughing at the hilarity of the situation.
- Trust your instincts. I have always been someone who has tried to follow and trust in my gut instinct, but of course we sometimes doubt ourselves (this is why I should have listened when I was wearing those ripped waistband jeans ala Mariah Carey circa 2002). I felt like the day I found out I was pregnant I had complete and utter faith in my instincts. I knew when I needed to rest and made sure I did everything possible to look after myself especially in those scary first three months, and I would cancel plans if I knew my body was saying to take it easy, even if it pissed people off. I had a responsibility now and I had to respect my body and my gut instincts. I trusted it when I couldn’t feel Josh moving when I was around 8 months gone, and took myself off to hospital to get monitored; I felt quite lucky that I was of the mentality that my baby came first, I didn’t feel that I’d be wasting anyone’s time. And now with him here, I know him better than anyone. I know when he’s not quite right, I know when he’s just having a whinge and looking for a bit of welcome attention, I know when he’s truly happy and relaxed. There is never any doubt in my mind that I know that boy inside and out.
- Drink! Now yes, I know, I am the self proclaimed prosecco princess. I love it; it’s my treat, my indulgence, and sometimes, my life line at the end of a shit day. However, I am useless; I’ve always been somewhat of a lightweight, and Sam has always teased me about how long it takes me to drink a glass of wine. I’ve been known to take two hours nursing one!!! I can’t even remotely deal with the prospect of a hangover. I think I’ve had one proper hangover since having Josh and it is not something I wish to repeat; that feeling of tired eyes that literally sting, a headache that seem to be impossible to get rid of. No thank you! I’ll stick to my two whole glasses of fizz on a Friday night and that’s enough for me!
- Take any shit! Us Mums get a lot of unasked for advice, opinions, and questioning as to why we are doing things a certain way. I’m a feisty little mare anyway, and as I’ve already said I feel confident in my abilities as a Mum. So I’ve quickly learnt how to deal with others feeling it’s fine to impart their pearls of wisdom…… but I always do it with a sweet smile on my face.
- Go a day without chatting to my Mum friends. I’d be lost without them. They are my lifelines, my encouragement, my inspiration, my best friends.
- Go a day without being hit by the love I have for Josh. Obviously we are all insanely in love with our kids all day every day, but I feel so blessed that every day there is a moment when he does something to make me laugh, or just does something super cute and I just have to scoop him up and give him a cuddle cause I just love him so bloody much!
- Judge. I just can’t and won’t judge other Mums. None of us have it easy. We all have our challenges, our stressful days. And dare I say it, we all make mistakes. None of us are going to be the perfect parent because in my humble opinion, that simply does not exist. As a parent we’re on a constant learning curve. Our kids are teaching us things they’ll never even realise. I won’t judge other Mums for their choices and decisions, I support them. I will always offer words of encouragement to any parent. I don’t ever want to be a judgeypants. I’ve seen other parents quite frankly looking down their noses for others choices. I’ve felt that judgement, and I’ve been made to feel like a small person because of the way someone has chosen to word things about my parenting style. But I for one can vow to never do that to a fellow parent.
What have you learnt since becoming a parent? Apart from the fact that you are 100% rocking it! Speaking of which (this is such a tedious link, but let’s just go with it) please check out a new Instagram community from myself and my lovely friend Lynne from New Mummy Blog. You guys know how much I love celebrating you all; mothers, parents, women, friends, sisters. So often we fail to notice just how much we are indeed rocking being a Mummy; recognising the little victories is so important. You got to the bottom of the laundry bin – winning, you made it round Sainsburys without an epic toddler tantrum – life made for a day! And seeing each other celebrating these little victories, and of course rewarding ourselves, is so empowering and motivating! It’s so important to me to help other Mums celebrate just how bloody brilliantly we are doing. We rock – look at what we achieve every day, multi tasking about ten things at once; emptying the dishwasher, getting out for a walk, being at a tiny persons constant beck and for food, cuddles and attention, hovering the house, getting dinner on the go. I think it’s safe to say, none of us stop! And perhaps that’s one thing I’ve really really learnt since having a baby – the realisation of just how much I am capable of! And these are the things we need to celebrate. Cause I keep telling you, we got this!